Forgiveness: The Finale

“For if you forgive other people when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you.” Matthew 6:14

It took me awhile to call my “daddy issues” to the stand because honestly, I WAS NOT READY TO FORGIVE THEM.  My daddy issues have become my security net in a way… Whenever I wanted out of a situation, or an excuse to be alone, or a reason for my outlandish behaviors I always blamed it on my “daddy issues.” HOWEVER (COMMA) I know that in order for me to grow into who I am truly supposed to be I have to LET THAT HURT GO and free myself from my “daddy issues”.

Your Honor, if you would allow, I would like to read a letter to my “daddy issues”…  

Judge (Lindsey’s Mind): Yes, you may…

Here goes…

Dear “daddy issues”,

I want to get married… I want to trust people that I am in SHIPS with… I want to be vulnerable… I want to be fearless… I want to be able to receive love… I want peace in my heart and in my mind… I don’t want to be alone anymore… I want to comfortably love someone… I want to love myself… I want to trust myself… I want to love my child without worry of him being another man that’s going to hurt me… Therefore, I have to let you go because if I don’t you will ruin every SHIP that I attempt to develop with anyone, even the SHIP with myself. If I don’t let go of the hurt that you have caused me, I will always be looking over my shoulder waiting on the next person to hurt me… to break my heart… to betray me… I will never have peace and be completely FREE from you… I have to let you go.

I have to free myself from you… I deserve that… you took so much from me and now it’s time for me to give it back to myself… no more being sad every single day… I will no longer allow you to dictate my life… to make my decisions on my behalf… I am releasing myself from you… as difficult as it may be, I am going to free myself from the one thing that is stopping me from living completely free. 

I know that I have tried to defeat you before and I was unsuccessful but this time… this time I will defeat you because this time I am not starting from scratch, I have experience with you… I have learned your areas of attack… you always start with my imperfections, making me think that something is wrong with me… that I am not good enough… then you work your way into my thoughts about how others view me… BUT THIS TIME YOU WILL NOT WIN… I am done allowing you to beat me… I may not be good enough for you but I am good enough for myself… this time when you try to attack me I will use my imperfections… they are my weapons… and I know that what others think oof me do not defined who I am… I DEFINE WHO I AM!

I am freeing myself from this prison and I am going to burn this bitch down… my sister use to say to me often, “Lynn, only you know when you have had enough.” and DADDY ISSUES, I HAVE HAD ENOUGH OF EVERY HURT YOU HAVE CAUSE ME ALL 34 YEARS OF MY LIFE… I am done with you… no more excuses… WE ARE DONE… it may not be forever… you may find your way back in but I will beat you EVERY SINGLE TIME because YOU WILL NOT AND CANNOT CONTROL ME ANYMORE.

Along with letting you go I HAVE TO FORGIVE YOU… I have to forgive you without an apology… I have to forgive you without ever hearing the words I am sorry… I have to forgive you because if I don’t I am going to rot in this self made prison that is protected by a steel wall, rabid pit bulls, and bobbed wire fencing… I have to forgive you because I want to live FREELY… THEREFORE, DADDY ISSUES, I, LINDSEY, FORGIVE YOU.

Unapologetically,

Lindsey

Your Honor I have nothing further to say.

Judge: Daddy Issues, you may step down.

Juries verdict:

ALL RISE

In the matter of Lindsey v. Lindsey we find the defendant guilty.

In the matter of Lindsey v. God we find the defendant NOT guilty.

In the matter of Lindsey v. Daddy Issues we find the defendant guilty.

Judge’s Ruling:

The court rules in favor of God and sentence Lindsey to a lifetime of her allowing him to guide her and lead her every move. She is no longer allowed to operate off of her own emotions but only after prayer and meditation and she must wait to hear God’s voice.

THIS COURT IS DISMISSED… LINDSEY AND GOD… YOU ALL ARE FREE TO GO 🙏🏾

#thechiceducator🍎

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